Pondering

Derek Enns

Father, how broken I am. There is a hole that I keep falling into. It is a deep pit and while at times it seems like I have crawled out I have never left the pit. With each step up I find myself falling back a step. This sin draws me into its core. A place of deceitfulness and lust. Lies, broken hearts, lost souls, broken families; it is a plague and spreads like a disease. While it may seem harmless on the outside, on the inside it is a vicious germ that consumes you; it is a nicotine. You cannot overcome it on your own. I thought I could win this battle- have for periods at a time- but somehow it keeps coming back. I crave it. Why is it that I do that which I know is evil and against my morals. I cannot do this on my own. I pray for strength, wisdom, and a clear mind. Only by your grace Lord will I ever be washed clean of this sin. This is my prayer Lord, that you would help me be a man of integrity. Not only for myself, but all who I encounter. I want to be freed from the chains that have been holding me down for so long. My life is in your hands. Enable me to do your will.